"That's really what life is all about." He pauses, monologue over, and waits for me.
"Life is about realizing you might be bisexual?" Even I am surprised at how much of an edge there is to my voice. I'm sure he can hear it. The knot in my stomach drops. I should not have told him about my conversation with the grocery store clerk. I was fishing for a simple validation and caught an Ultimate Truth instead. That's therapy for you.
"It's about connection." He says, unaffected by my frustration. "And not just in the sexual sense. To be honest, that encounter you described seemed to be less about physical attraction and more about genuinely wanting to get to know someone you met. Going to new places, interacting with new people, wanting to learn more: that kind of excited curiosity is a major part of what makes life interesting."
"Who doesn't want to learn more?"
"Lots of people. Have you thought about going back?"
"Look, I only went alone because my roommate Sam was sick. I can't do that again."
"Because I can't even show up to your office most of the time."
Silence. I'm never sure if he's thinking of what to say or waiting for me to say more.
I wait for a full two minutes before I realize the call dropped. I'm scrolling to his name in my contact list when I remember how hungry I am and that we're out of ginger ale again.
12 May 2013