Move your mouse over here!
Previous page

Preacher Man

He didn't plan for the Second Coming of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ Tour to end this way. He had not planned to be expelled from the seminary, for transgressions that veterans of the confessional spoke about only in whispers. Patrick Francis O'Reilly was the seminary's star - a booming baritone whose reverberations evoked God the Father on Mt Sinai and an uncanny recall of Biblical verses. Neighboring parishes clamored for him to preach.

One Saturday afternoon, he left the seminary for St. Anne's Church to prepare for Sunday service. He later claimed he took the wrong street car and ended up at Pimlico Race Track, where he put two dollars on the 50 to 1 shot, Shooting Star, and won. He intended to put the winnings into the poor box, but passing Leary's Pub, reckoned a small celebration was called for. He slipped in for a wee nip and there, met Lola.

His sermon at Sunday Mass was sufficiently noteworthy to be reported in the Baltimore Sun "Priest and Prostitute Perform in Pulpit." Patrick went down to Penn Station and caught the first train west. His collar was his fare. By the time he reached Lubbock, Texas, seminarian Patrick Francis O'Reilly had become the Reverend Jebediah Elijah Barnes and the Second Coming Tour was born.

Bobbie Sue sat in the front row of the revival tent pitched just outside of town. A pretty girl in a crisp white sun dress. The Reverend was convinced that she was enthralled by his oration. He beckoned to her after the service. And now, behind the stage, his wide lips moved irrevocably toward her small pink ones. The sweetness he pined for was cut short by a sharp pain between his legs and the fading shadow of a dress.

Story by:

Townsend Walker

30 September 2013