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Irrationality Overload

The radio host had absolutely had it with all these goddamned callers, and started screaming at them when they lapsed into well-worn cliches.

He was sick of how they prattled on, abandoning any pretense of logic, stooping to aspersions, demonizing dissenters, endlessly regurgitating the same talking points over and over regardless of context. He couldn’t stand hearing the same haggard platitudes over and over. Their entire belief system could be scrawled on a barroom napkin and there would still be plenty of white space.

Having a DJ play the Top 40 hits ad infinitum would be less repetitive. He had wanted to do something great with his life, and he was imprisoned in a studio hearing ramblers circle round to the same points again and again.

One day, with little premonition, he snapped.

The radio host started chastising callers. He challenged them. How can you be so barely functional? How ignorant do you have to be to think that? When’s the last time you sat down and read a book cover to cover?

At first there was pushback. Listeners blanched. They hesitated to call in, even stopped listening. But the spirited tirades eventually found a wider audience.

Even as ratings soared, the radio host got angrier and angrier. After fulminating to the point of frothy spittle one morning, he ended his shift and popped across the street for a gyro for lunch.

The salty, greasy cone of glistening meat made his heart feel like it would swell up and explode. He welcomed it, oh he welcomed death.

Story by:

Joseph S. Pete

jpete@alumni.iu.edu

@nwi_jsp

2 March 2017