Blue Pinto Hatchback
"I'm looking for a blue Pinto Hatchback," Jim told the used car salesman.
"Ford stopped making them," the salesman said, replying to the password. "But I have better things. Step inside my trailer."
Once inside, the salesman removed a container from a freezer. "Don't touch this without gloves. You'll get instant frost bite." Scrutinizing the thing in the container, Jim said, "Looks like a blue hot dog. Is that the original color?"
"That's what the Air Force medic said, who swiped this alien finger from the slop buckets at the Roswell morgue."
"How much?" "One-million in gold."
Jim removed gold ingots from a briefcase. While the salesman prepared a receipt, Jim called someone on his cell phone. "My client wants to know what else you got."
"A blue head."
"He wants to know if it can be defrosted. He wants to display it in his den along his unicorn and dragon head."
"It might rot if defrosted. Same with the alien finger."
"I'll tell him," Jim said.
"Meanwhile, can I interest you in a nice used car? I got the hottest deals in New Mexico."
"Nah, but I'd like boots made from a reptilian or gray."
"Me too. We'll, one of these days another bunch of them will crash somewhere, and we'll skin the bastards. Then I'll have a nice selection of boots, lamp shades, wallets, and other doodads. Gimme your business card. I'll put your name on the waiting list."
submitted at 5:09am
22 February 2011
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