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I Never Kissed Grace Kelly

I'm going to kiss her even though I am a married man.

I remember seeing her in old Hitchcock movies, a Goddess on the silver screen. I remember what James Stewart said about her: 'I just love Grace Kelly. Not because she was a princess, not because she was an actress, not because she was my friend, but because she was just about the nicest lady I ever met.'

Those words echo through my head as I try to catch my breath. Digging down six feet of dirt that has been rested since her death in '82 is tiring. I stand on her coffin. I'm excited to kiss her. I was about to pry the casket open, but I decided against it. I have too much respect for her. She was too nice of a person to be treated this way. I climb out of the grave, covered it back up and began walking home.

Along the way, I think about Judy Garland. She was beautiful and I don't respect her at all.

"Hmm," I say aloud. "I wonder where she's buried at."

Story by:

Chad Case

submitted at 7:16pm

27 September 2011

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